Priest Simulator: Vampire Show

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In "Priest Simulator: Vampire Show," players step into the shoes of a vampire who disguises themselves as a priest to infiltrate a religious community. They must balance their predatory nature with their holy facade, completing tasks and making choices that impact their standing with both the humans and the vampires. With a mix of stealth, puzzle-solving, and narrative elements, players must navigate a unique and morally ambiguous world.

Genres & Tags

Play Modes

Single-Player

Priest Simulator: Vampire Show screenshot

+20

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88%

Audience ScoreBased on 358 reviews

story46 positive mentions

optimization3 negative mentions

The game features a unique and absurd storyline that combines humor with dark themes, making it a refreshing experience.
Players appreciate the quirky characters and the engaging voice acting, especially in the original Polish language.
The gameplay is described as fun and chaotic, with a mix of action, exploration, and bizarre tasks that keep players entertained.

Many players find the combat shallow and repetitive, with some missions feeling like tedious fetch quests.
The game suffers from translation issues and bugs, which can detract from the overall experience and make navigation frustrating.
Some players criticize the game's optimization and performance, noting that it can be buggy and may not run well on lower-end systems.

story
114 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
40%
51%
9%
The game's story is a quirky and eccentric narrative centered around Orlok, a vampire turned priest in a bizarre Polish village, featuring absurd humor and a cast of eccentric characters. While many players appreciate the unique storytelling and entertaining dialogue, some criticize the plot for becoming repetitive and less engaging as the game progresses, with a mix of fetch quests that can detract from the overall experience. Overall, the story is seen as a highlight for those who prioritize narrative in their gaming experience, despite some technical and pacing issues.
- “An Abrahamic coming-of-age story about pursuing one's goals not because of power or luxury, but in spite of them; a game about the choices you as an individual make and the willpower of your friends; a game about the journey, not the destination.”
- “A vampire from hell thrust into the role of a 'Christianist' priest in a Polish village running around slaying heretic 'Shatanists' while being ordered around by a cast of crazy characters (including a sock puppet and a frog alien) with the most wacky dialogue and story I've seen since maybe Saints Row the Third.”
- “The storytelling in this game is a very unique experience and so far it's some good stuff.”
- “In general, I found the game weird, but the story is not that great, not that funny, and the voices of some characters, including Orlok, are so annoying.”
- “The game's story gets weaker, more confusing, and just filled with padding.”
- “This, however, quickly fades away as the dialogues aren't really funny and the story becomes boring too quickly.”
humor
90 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
98%
2%
The humor in the game is described as a mix of absurd, crude, and irreverent styles, often eliciting laughter through its bizarre scenarios and quirky characters. While many players find the dialogue and voice acting entertaining, some criticize it for being overly weird or not consistently funny. Overall, the game is recommended for those who appreciate its unique comedic approach, despite some mixed opinions on its execution and story depth.
- “If you’re looking for something fun, funny, and completely over the top, this is definitely a must-play.”
- “Prepare yourselves for a divine gaming experience with 'Priest Simulator,' a holy game that will have you laughing and saying your Hail Marys in equal measure.”
- “A hilarious fever dream.”
- “Do not waste your money - not funny, bad gameplay, too many boring cutscenes.”
gameplay
44 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
23%
68%
9%
The gameplay of this single-player, first-person simulator is a mixed bag, featuring a blend of various genres but criticized for its linearity and basic mechanics. While some players appreciate the unique humor and fun quests, others find the gameplay stale and bogged down by excessive cutscenes and convoluted writing. Overall, it offers a decent experience but lacks depth and challenge, particularly in combat mechanics.
- “This single-player, first-person simulator blends elements of shooters, hack’n’slash, mockumentaries, racing, renovation, and sandbox gameplay.”
- “This game is awesome in my opinion, humor is unique and fun, gameplay feels good, quests are interesting and boss battles give you a good challenge.”
- “For the most part, the gameplay works as intended and is fun thanks to the craziness of the world.”
- “I haven’t seen any content, other than the multiple other copy-pasted games with the same mechanics, art style, and engine.”
- “Con: sadly game systems are very few and bare bone, which makes the gameplay boring.”
- “The gameplay is mostly busy work, with writing that constantly meanders and interrupts the game to add more layers of convolution until the whole thing turns from arbitrary to word salad.”
music
32 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
44%
47%
9%
The music in the game has received mixed reviews, with many praising its upbeat and engaging metal soundtrack that enhances the gameplay experience, particularly during boss fights. However, some players noted that the music can be repetitive and often gets overshadowed by the overworld music, limiting the impact of the standout tracks. Overall, while the soundtrack is appreciated for its rhythm and humor, its repetitiveness and background presence detract from its potential.
- “Dark comedy with a metal soundtrack, 5 stars!”
- “Best thing about this game so far has to be the music.”
- “Soundtrack is upbeat, with good rhythm, melodic riffs, and a tasteful amount of distortion/reverb for metal.”
- “The controls are good, the music is cool, but really repetitive.”
- “The soundtrack is okay.”
- “Yet, during that entire time, the stars aligned just enough to drop a soundtrack and a few cut missions as DLC.”
graphics
20 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
60%
25%
15%
The graphics of the game receive mixed reviews, with some players praising the art style and smooth performance, while others criticize the limited graphic options and performance issues, such as low frame rates. Despite these drawbacks, many appreciate the overall visual appeal and compatibility with ultra-wide monitors. Overall, while the graphics are generally considered good, they are overshadowed by technical problems and a lack of originality in design.
- “The graphics are quite good, and the game runs smoothly.”
- “Graphics are nice, supports ultra-wide monitor perfectly, sounds are good with a lot of voice acting, the story is diabolic and interesting.”
- “Game looks amazing; graphics are outstanding.”
- “It also gets like 10 to 20 fps when on any graphics setting, making it literally unplayable.”
- “Cutscenes make no sense, extremely few graphic options cause motion sickness; I was expecting something else.”
- “I haven’t seen any content other than the multiple other copy-pasted games with the same mechanics, art style, and engine.”
optimization
8 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
25%
37%
38%
Overall, the game's optimization is a significant concern among players, particularly for lower-end systems, with many reporting poor performance even on mid-range hardware. While some users appreciate the graphics and smooth gameplay, the consensus is that optimization needs to be prioritized, especially given the game's early access status.
- “The graphics are quite good, and the game runs smoothly.”
- “I understand this game is in early access, but I think that they should prioritize proper optimization for lower-end systems.”
- “Horrible humor, also terribly optimized.”
- “Honestly, the game is good, but the optimization is horrible on RX 5700 XT OC and R5 3600. It does mid 40-50 FPS on low settings; other than that, the game is quite buggy.”
stability
6 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
100%
The game suffers from significant stability issues, with users reporting frequent bugs and poor optimization, particularly on specific hardware setups like the RX 5700 XT and R5 3600. Players have encountered glitches that prevent progression, such as doors not opening and characters failing to jump, detracting from the overall experience.
- “Honestly, the game is good, but the optimization is horrible on RX 5700 XT OC and R5 3600. It runs at mid 40-50 FPS on low settings; other than that, the game is quite buggy.”
- “The story is funny, but you can't get to the second part of the church because of glitches. The door won't open, and the character won't jump.”
- “There have been more than a couple of times when it would be really useful, and it's buggy.”
grinding
6 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
100%
Players find the grinding aspect of the game to be tedious and aggravating, particularly when it comes to achievement hunting and resource farming. Many express frustration with the slow pace required to collect items and increase certain metrics, making the experience feel laborious.
- “If you are an achievement hunter, know that getting all the graffiti is going to be tedious.”
- “I have only played this game for 24 minutes and those were the most aggravating and tedious 24 minutes of my life.”
- “The only slow parts were getting/farming resources and trying to increase the faith (or whatever it was called) near the end.”
character development
4 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
50%
50%
Reviewers express surprise and delight at the character development in the game, noting that it exceeds their expectations and is complemented by impressive character design.
- “I really did not expect myself to say this, but there is some actual character development.”
- “The character design kills me (in a good way).”
atmosphere
4 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
50%
50%
The game successfully captures a nostalgic 2000s atmosphere reminiscent of titles like Half-Life, creating a visually appealing and immersive experience. Reviewers appreciate its strong aesthetic and engaging gameplay, contributing to an overall cool and atmospheric vibe.
- “I love that 2000's atmosphere, and this game has it aplenty (think also of Half-Life).”
- “Very atmospheric and cool looking game, also quite fun gameplay.”
emotional
2 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
100%
Players find the game to be a deeply emotional experience, often eliciting laughter to the point of tears, creating a surreal and memorable atmosphere akin to a fever dream.
- “Laughed until I cried; it's like a fever dream.”
replayability
2 mentions Positive Neutral Negative
50%
50%
Overall, while the game offers a solid initial playthrough, many users feel that it lacks significant replay value due to some dragging sections and frustrating relic-hunting mechanics.
- “There are a few places where it starts to drag, and hunting the different relics was rather frustrating, but all in all it's good for a playthrough, although there doesn't seem to be much replay value for it at the moment.”

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8h Median play time

6h Average play time

1-10h Spent by most gamers

*Based on 4 analyzed playthroughs

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